Friar Cous Cous

Trussed-up in a wartime bandage-suit...

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Christmas Is Nearly Here...Again!!!

So why not treat your family, friends and most vivid enemies with some of these Christmas ideas on sale for this one of your Christmases?

White Pot and Black Kettle Set
Now your pot can call your kettle black in the complete absence of irony and with zero hypocrisy.

Lasers
Three lasers of equal strength in a leather gift box with complementary 'Guide to Lasers' handbook.

Treasure
A massive chest of treasure featuring jewels, crowns and gold coins, with authentic iron hinges and locks, made of authentically aged oak, expertly treated with sea-water, sand and parrot droppings. For the poor sailor in the family.

KFC Christmas Tree
Ever tire of the same old stale chocolate borbles wrapped in silver foil hanging from the branches of your Christmas tree? Every single decoration on this tree is a sparkling foil gift containing the choicest cuts of fried chicken made the way only The Colonel and his closest friends know how. And how.

Bargain Laser Set
Just two lasers presented in a leather-effect pouch, with complementary slip.

A Ship's Bell
In hand-polished brass with your own personalised engraving, mounted in a glass and mahogany case adorned with maritime-themed filigree. Ideal for the wealthier ex-sailor or ship's bell enthusiast.

4 Comments:

Blogger nutgroist said...

Im hoping for a solid Shanty in my xmas cocksock. thanks in advance

3:34 pm  
Blogger swampsterjy said...

i've already asked from a distanced aunt that album what I lent you in the lower sixth and you never gave back. Not a replacement. The ACTUAL album.

5:16 pm  
Blogger Big Poe... said...

I'm not materialistic: I'll be happy if someone rings the bell on my mandlebar.

10:16 am  
Blogger DJ Councillor Gyro Kredit said...

Nice to see you back Friar.

Let's not forget the eye repair kits which were so popular last year. Apparently you can buy them for pets now.

Incidentally, do you recall when KFC first trialed those trees, and they all had to be recalled? It seemed a little crazy that gravy had been deemed a viable decoration, especially when it was so scauldingly hot. And you know how instinctive it is for kids to want to touch the gravy.

2:22 pm  

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